27 year old Med Student with Schizophrenia

It really is sad to see someone who wants so badly to lead a “normal” life not be able to and be held back by their mental illness. I will call her Deanna, shes a 27 year old girl of Asian descent who has a bachelors degree, took the MCAT and was interviewed for a medical school. Her parents started noticing some delusional and bizarre behavior and that’s how she ended up with us. When I first met Deanna I would have never thought that there was anything wrong with her, she was extremely polite, seemed to be very aware of social norms and could hold an intelligent conversation very easily. I was very surprised when I heard that she had taken off her clothes the night before and ran herself into the window multiple times. She suffered badly from Schizophrenia and had voices telling her to hurt herself. Deanna was very good at hiding her internal stimuli but I would catch her every night sitting on her desk in her room talking to herself. You see some people with schizophrenia are very aware of their disorder and are embarrassed of it. They try to hide it as best as they can but it is still obvious to us. Deanna also thought she had a husband named Jordan who lived in the Unit with her. She came up to me one time and said, ” Can I have an extra towel?” When I asked why she told me that it was for her husband Jordan. It was pretty awkward when I asked her where he was and she pointed down the hallway to nobody. I said I couldn’t see him and she just said, ” Oh, ok.” and sadly walked away with her head down. I think she realized in that moment that maybe he wasn’t real. Another time Deanna walked up to another male patient who had just arrived on the Unit ( keep in mind, this patient was also extremely psychotic and confused) and said to him, ” Do you want to have sex with me?” He stared at her in complete confusion and disbelief, waited a few moments and then said, ” Well…not… right now…”

She was extremely introspective, always writing in her journal. Its seemed like this was extremely therapeutic for her, this was her way of coping with all of the “demons” in her head.  Deanna was also so sweet, asking me how my day was going ( which is pretty rare). She was someone I could actually sit down and talk to about life. The last day she was with us I talked to her quite a bit and she told me all about how she wanted to go to med school and how she had already taken the MCAT. Here there is this extremely intelligent woman wanting so badly to be normal and functional and she cant be. It made me be so aware of how blessed I am to be able to function and do the things I want and need to do. Schizophrenia is something that Deanna will always struggle with, she may never lead a normal life and I had so much compassion and love for her at that moment. I really do hope and wish her the best for her life.


2 thoughts on “27 year old Med Student with Schizophrenia

  1. Pingback: My Psych Patients at the Moment | talscrazylife

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